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Me, myself, and lies

“That filled a void in my relationship with you, thank you.” My brother, responded to my most recent column about my relationship with Mom with this brief comment that warmed my heart. But my column had also opened an uncomfortable box of memories which I’d become very adept at closing off. Like Pandora’s box, I wondered what to do with them once they’d been released. I didn’t like what these memories said about me. Somehow, they managed to cloud out all the good I’d done and replace it with a picture of a self-centered, grasping, young woman who often put her own desires ahead of others. Mom laughed when I described my experience. “Stop the pity party, only you think those things.” Whether this is true, and I believe the truth lies somewhere in between, I realized forgiveness is difficult to give and especially be received, by ourselves. It is as if we see ourselves in a fun house mirror through the unreliable lens of our faulty, one-sided memories. Perhaps that is why God created m…

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